Just a word of encouragement to those of you struggling with this. I was the one who would lash out in the beginning years of our marriage. I wasn't grumpy, but if I got angry with my husband I would say the most terrible things. I even brought him to tears, I'd hurt him so badly with my mouth. Thankfully he was praying for me and he never once, in all these years of marriage (29) said one nasty thing to me, not even when he's been angry. In time the Lord began to open my eyes to how I was behaving. He showed me a picture of myself and it wasn't pretty. Our marriage was going through a real struggle for awhile, but then the Lord helped me with this problem. I apologized to my husband and I began watching my words. Even now when I get angry, I go off quietly and pray and yes sometimes I complain, but it's in private between the Lord and me.
Our marriage has transformed over the years and we have gotten closer. My changing caused my husband to change in those areas that were very frustrating to me. I guess what I'm trying to say is, don't give up. Keep praying for your husbands, keep on loving them. The Lord can and will intervene.. You do your part. and HE will take care of the rest.
Jeremiah 31:16-17 "Thus says the LORD: Refrain your voice from weeping, and your eyes from tears; for your work (raising of your children, prayer) shall be rewarded, says the LORD, and they (your children) shall come back from the land of the enemy.